Carlina White Found Identity, but Now Has to Find Self
Jan 23, 2011 – 8:01 AM
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David Lohr
David Lohr Contributor
Snatched from a hospital as a baby, Carlina White painstakingly tracked down her real identity and was reunited with her birth family. But now that she's found her true self, she has to get used to it.
And if history is any indication, she faces a very tough road ahead.
"What could be more disturbing than discovering something that is so earth shattering to your own identity?" asked psychotherapist Nicole S. Urdang, a licensed mental health counselor in Buffalo, N.Y.
"She has all this new information that she has to integrate, and I'm sure she is feeling emotionally shell-shocked," Urdang told AOL News.
Carlina White was not yet a month old when she was kidnapped from a Harlem hospital on Aug. 4, 1987, authorities said. They say a woman posing as a nurse stole the baby, but they were unable to find any trace of the missing infant.
Unbeknownst to her family, the little girl was given the name Nejdra Nance and was raised in Bridgeport, Conn.
Children Lost and Found
Julia Xanthos, NY Daily News / Getty Images
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Growing up in Bridgeport, Conn., Nejdra Nance suspected she wasn't really related to the woman she called "Mom." Finally, she found her baby picture on a missing children's website. She was born Carlina Renae White and was less than a month old when she was snatched from a New York City hospital in 1987. Now 23, she has been reunited with her birth parents. Click through for other cases.
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Children Lost and Found
Growing up in Bridgeport, Conn., Nejdra Nance suspected she wasn't really related to the woman she called "Mom." Finally, she found her baby picture on a missing children's website. She was born Carlina Renae White and was less than a month old when she was snatched from a New York City hospital in 1987. Now 23, she has been reunited with her birth parents. Click through for other cases.
Julia Xanthos, NY Daily News / Getty Images
Julia Xanthos, NY Daily News / Getty Images
Nance eventually began to suspect something was awry and in December, the now 23-year-old woman, who lives in Georgia, found a photo of a missing baby named Carlina Renae White on the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children's website.
Officials used DNA tests to confirm earlier this month that Nejdra is Carlina, the biological daughter of Joy White and Carl Tyson.
"We're talking about a radical reshifting of her heart, her mind and her allegiances," Urdang said. "Not the least of which is the issue of trust. Nothing in this case is black and white. It would be like thinking you were standing on terra firma and then finding out you're on quicksand."
Nance traveled to New York last weekend and met the family she had not seen in more than two decades.
Police have not named a suspect in the alleged abduction. White was raised by a woman named Ann Pettway, and police want to question her, The Associated Press reported. But she is believed to be on the run. Pettway is on probation for a conviction of attempted embezzlement in North Carolina, and corrections officials have been unable contact her about the case, the AP said. A warrant was issued for her arrest Friday for allegedly leaving the state while on probation.
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According to a law enforcement source, local and federal agencies are investigating the case.
"Charges will likely be brought by federal law enforcement," the source told AOL News.
Nance and her biological parents, meanwhile, must work as adults toward creating the relationship they were prevented from building when she was a child.
"Any kind of shock requires gentleness, kindness and compassion from all of those around them, but most especially from themselves, to understand that there is absolutely no appropriate reaction," Urdang said. "Any reaction is appropriate. All reactions are OK. It is also crucial for them to get every little shred of support they possibly can."
While the case is certainly bizarre, it is not unprecedented. Steven Stayner, Kimberly Mays and Shawn Hornbeck are just a few examples of similar cases in which kidnapped or switched-at-birth children were later reunited with their birth families. The result, however, tends to vary.
Steven Stayner: On Dec. 4, 1972, Steven, then 7, was abducted while on his way home from school in Merced, Calif. His kidnapper, Kenneth Parnell, sexually assaulted the child repeatedly over a period of several years. He gave Steven a new name, Dennis, and told the little boy over and over that his parents no longer wanted him. Eventually, Steven came to believe it.
When Steven was 14, Parnell decided he needed a younger boy, and kidnapped 5-year-old Timmy White in Ukiah, Calif. Wanting to save Timmy from what he had suffered, Steven escaped with the younger boy in March 1980 and went to police.
In 1981, Parnell was tried and convicted of kidnapping Steven and Timmy. He was sentenced to seven years but was paroled after serving five years. Parnell later died in prison of natural causes while serving 25 years to life in an unrelated case.
Reunited with his family, Steven reportedly had a difficult time adapting. On Sept. 16, 1989, he was killed in a motorcycle accident. He was just 24.
Roughly 10 years later, his brother, Cary Stayner, confessed to being a serial killer and was sentenced to death.
On April 1, 2010, Timmy White, who had become a Los Angeles County sheriff's deputy, died of a pulmonary embolism. He was 35 years old.
Kimberly Mays: She was born in November 1979 at a hospital in Wauchula, Fla., and switched at birth with Arlena Twigg, a girl who died of a heart defect at the age of 9. Ernest and Regina Twigg learned from blood tests that Arlena could not be their child. After Arlena's death, they went looking for their biological daughter, and found Kimberly.
Bob Mays, the man who had raised Kimberly as his daughter, initially granted the Twiggs visitation rights but later rescinded them. A lawsuit ensued, and in 1993, a court ruled that Mays was the girl's psychological father and that she could cut ties with the Twiggs if she wanted.
Kimberly later ran away from home and moved in with the Twiggs for a period, before bouncing between homes and a shelter for troubled youths. In 1997, at the age of 18, she married a 19-year-old named Jeremy Weeks.
In 1999, Kimberly's 21-month-old son, Devin Weeks, was taken away by Florida's Department of Children and Families, the New York Daily News reported. The state agency, citing confidentiality laws, declined to identify the reason for its action. A yearlong custody battle followed, and Kimberly was eventually reunited with her son. She has managed to stay out of the media spotlight since the court battle.
Shawn Hornbeck: On Oct. 6, 2002, 11-year-old Shawn was kidnapped while riding his bicycle near his Richwoods, Mo., home. For the next 4 1/2 years, Shawn was held by pizzeria manager Michael J. Devlin.
In January 2007, Devlin kidnapped another boy, 13-year-old Ben Ownby. Police acting on a tip raided Devlin's home in Kirkwood, Mo., and found Ben -- and Shawn.
Devlin confessed to his crimes and was sentenced to three life sentences for kidnapping, child molestation and production of child pornography.
In September 2008, Shawn broke his silence about the ordeal during an interview on CBS's "48 Hours Mystery."
"I've gone through some stuff that'll send psychiatrists insane," Hornbeck told CBS correspondent Troy Roberts. "It's on a level [most people] never had to experience."
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In January 2010, Shawn's stepfather, Craig Akers, said the teen, then 18, had graduated high school early and was attending college. He attributed his the young man's success to therapists, whom he said helped him ensure that the events of his kidnapping did not define his life, the "Today" show reported.
How Carlina White -- or Nejdra Nance -- ultimately adjusts to her new life is yet to be seen, but according to Urdang, a positive outcome is possible.
"The jury is still out right now and all we can say for sure is that she has got a lot of what we call, in my trade, cognitive restructuring to do," she said. "The great thing is that the human brain is fairly elastic and can accommodate new thoughts and new feelings."
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